7 Ways to Say No Without Feeling Guilty
It’s such a small word, but so hard to use sometimes. We seem to use this word so easily with our spouses and children, but have a hard time saying it to other people.
So the trick is to figure out how and when to say no. I’m not saying you should be selfish and never help anyone. However, most people are running around stressed because they say yes to everyone but themselves.
You should only say yes when you really want to do something.
You feel excited at the thought of doing it, or it has to do with your life goals or definition of success.
You don’t have to have another date first to say no.
If you’ve planned to spend an evening inside (bubble bath, reading, TV, whatever…) and get asked out, it doesn’t automatically mean you have to accept. Meeting yourself is just as important as meeting other people. Value your time! Realize that when you say yes to one thing, you are ALWAYS saying no to something else.
When this happens, you usually say no to the more important parts of your life—God, family, yourself. For example, you are asked to help a committee at your child’s school. You may find yourself so busy with committee work that you deprive your child of quality time. Another example is saying yes to everyone at work who collects money for birthdays, leaving gifts, etc. and no to your own financial future.
Don’t instinctively say yes. Take the time to think about it first.
Always check your diary first before committing to plans. Or just take a deep breath. Otherwise, you end up saying yes to everything and at the end of a hectic period, you’re practically burned out.
The more you practice, the easier it becomes to say yes.
At first, when you have to say no to something or someone, you feel terrible. But it’s incredibly empowering when you realize you made the right decision by saying no. It’s an acquired skill, and the more you use your ‘no’ muscle, the stronger it will become. I promise.
When you say yes and feel resentment, it means you should have said no.
Learn to listen to your heart. The Bible says we should not give reluctantly or under compulsion, and yet many of us do. We say yes and harbor deep feelings of hurt and bitterness. Nothing good comes from a resentful attitude.
Saying no is easier when you are confident in your own abilities
When you say no firmly and without a creeping excuse, it affirms your self-respect and is a way of standing up for yourself. Men seem to be very good at this, but women seem to want to explain everything and apologize while saying no.
You don’t have to be rude or ugly about it – there are many ways to say no.
It can’t be “I can’t help you this time,” “I can only do it next month,” “that’s not my forte,” or just “no thanks.”
Make a quality decision this month to review your schedule and see where you’re saying yes to activities or commitments that don’t support your goals. Then try to say no to them so you can say yes to more important things.
#Ways #Feeling #Guilty